This page exists in memory of a very special lady...

Anna Louise Bivens Davis

January 30, 1925 - November 5, 1998

Louise Davis was my mother-in-law. She was a remarkable woman, and we miss her terribly. This page can never do justice to her, but it seemed a good way to let others know about her. More than anything, we want to give people information that might prevent some of the pain that Louise endured, or may prevent some families from going through the pain we are experiencing now.

Louise struggled with depression for over 30 years. For many of those years, medication allowed her to live a relatively normal life. She worked, and raised two sons. She was an active leader in bowling leagues, and meant a lot to her coworkers. The picture above was taken at her retirement from Bell South in Knoxville, TN. She functioned well, and seemed happy in her life.

Several years ago, the medications she had always taken seemed to stop working. She became very despondent. She went from one psychiatrist to another, and tried many different medications in the hope that something would help, something would allow her to regain her life. Sometimes, a medication would work for a little while, then gradually stop. She would get her hopes up that she might be getting better, only to find herself more depressed than before. This happened over and over. The psychiatrist she had seen over the last year was very patient, and tried to work with her as best he could.

Louise was a very private person, and was not willing to undergo what she called, "talk therapy". She felt that medications had worked for her for many years, thus she was sure that there must be a medication out there that would help like the ones before. She tried Electroconvulsive Therapy. This is usually extremely effective in treatment resistant depression, but the treatments must be repeated through several cycles. Louise was very concerned that she was not going to come out of the anesthesia that the treatments required, and after a few treatments, each time she stopped before they could do any good.

Louise was not willing to undergo inpatient treatment for her condition, either. For a private woman like her, she felt it was simply not an option.

On the night of October 2, 1998, Louise took a very large quantity of tricyclic antidepressants, coupled with tranquilizers. Her husband found her, unresponsive, the next morning. She was taken to the emergency room and admitted to intensive care. At this time, while she was not conscious, she was breathing on her own. Over the next few days, her breathing began to deteriorate as she developed Adult Respiratory Distress Syndrome. She was put on a ventilator on October 5. She only regained consciousness after the ventilator was in place, so we couldn't talk to her. She was only conscious a few days before her condition worsened and she had to be sedated all the time. She was in extremely critical condition. After almost 4 weeks on the ventilator the health care team decided to try to wean her from the ventilator. They stopped all the sedating drugs. Louise never regained consciousness. We don't really know why. We did find out when she was admitted to the hospital that she had a history of multiple strokes--no one had any idea when these might have happened. There were no strokes while she was in the hospital.

After she had been off the sedating drugs for more than a week, the family met with the doctor and decided to discontinue life support. At this time, Louise had no reflexes, and no response even to deep pain. Twenty-four hours later, on November 5, 1998 Anna Louise Davis was dead. It took 5 weeks for her to finally accomplish what she had set out to do. Her life, and her suffering, were over. The family continues to suffer. My husband misses his mother horribly. I miss the time I could have had with her, getting to know her better, and showing her how much I appreciate having her wonderful son in my life.

Her husband is alone now, as we live 2 hours away, and their other son lives much further. We do what we can to make sure he is all right, though, and perhaps he will choose to move nearer to us. If not, we will continue to go back and forth between the two cities, and take care of him as best we can.

Louise's suicide attempt and eventual death have left a hole for me that can never be filled. I only knew her such a short time. We had really just started to build a relationship, and really get along, and now I'll never have the chance to continue it. There was one moment in the hospital while she was still conscious that I will forever treasure, though. We were standing by her bed, my husband and I, and she reached for my hand to hold. My hand! I knew in that moment that she truly had accepted me, that she knew I loved her son, and that I would care for him always. She knew he would be taken care of, and she was glad that I was the person who would do it. I will always remember the look in her eyes at that moment. And that is what I will carry with me.

If you are having problems coping with life, and you feel desperate enough to try to do what Louise did, please, please get help now! For over 90% of people, the treatment is successful, and soon! I would not wish the pain that we have gone through on any other family in the world. There is help!

For more information on suicide prevention and survival, please go here: Suicide Prevention and Survival Information or look through some of the books that are available that might help you, please? Talk to someone, a friend or a professional. Just don't try to cope with your own depression, or that of a loved one, alone and without help when there is help available.

 

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